insecurities.

despite how very hard i tried to fight them off, they eventually got the best of me. it was inevitable- the combination of being a female and my rational, argumentative mind-set make it quite impossible for me to ignore them. everything started with one innocent thought- 'this is to good to be true, i don't deserve someone like him..'

he is quite literally everything i've ever wanted. guys always say that a girls checklist condenses down to whatever makes her happy. true. but even extended, he ticked every single box- "what if the more he gets to know me, the more he sees me as just a friend... what if this brings out the worst in me.. what if it was just a case of right place, right time.. what if it was someone else standing there, right then and there.. how many other girls see what i see.. what if he gets fed up with me.. will he still me the same when.. what happens when this honey-moon is over.." and it goes on. i've come to realise that the checklist really is nothing more than mere guidelines- nowadays, there are so so many factors that may influence how you form any sort of relationship with anyone.

that being said, this boy still has accomplished a feat no other has. without a degree, without the stunning good looks, without the charisma, outspoken confidence and ambitious aspirations- he managed to outshine those with all the above and completely rock my world. insecurities will always be there, you just need to determined enough to push past them. no pain, no gain- those afraid to fall will never learn to fly. you're too amazing for me to just let you walk away. hold on tight, i've got my jet-pack on and you in my sights -
i'm a space-bound rocketship and the moon is your heart.

- jae.