owie.

we leave our past behind us because we choose to move on. not to forget it or regret it, but so we can grow and become who we want to be. we choose who we want be surrounded by, because in the end of the day they mean the most to us. but what happens when the people you want to be with, don't want to be around you anymore? is that when it's time to move on, and let it go. do we grow from this experience and just watch them pass by? i don't wouldn't know what to do, because letting go is something i'm not good at. i wish i was, then life wouldn't be so hard. i wouldn't constantly be trying to make things work. i guess growing apart is something you would never want to imagine, nor think about. everyone you love is just too important for you to leave behind. but of course, if you're not loved the same way, you're the one standing at the back of the crowd thinking "yeah, i used to know you too". don't think about it, just move on. it's in the past, and forward is where we all aim for.

i don't remember the last time my mouth hurt this much. when i think about it, i don't even know why i used to take so many drugs. the toll it has on your body is just incredible. i feel sore from head to toe! of course that could also be from drinking on saturday night too. when will i ever learn? sigh. someone help me with self control, i really need it.

- r