acceptance.

i always thought that if i kept telling myself something
that eventually it'd be true.
"keep smiling like everything's okay
and eventually it will be" -
keep telling myself i don't need you
and eventually i won't.
i still don't think i need you,
but i would really like you to still be part of my life.
i can deal with waking up every morning
knowing you're not here and you never will be.
i can deal with knowing i was only a fleeting moment in your life.
i can deal with it. really, i can.
even though i may not want to.
i don't want to keep comparing every potential suiter to you,
i don't want your voice to keep sounding in my head,
i don't want to see your face everytime i close my eyes.
sometimes, i wish i never met you at all.
sometimes, i'm glad that i did 'cause now
i know never to let my guard down,
not even for you - this is what you've done to me.

- jae.