choice.

sometimes i like sitting on the train. the train gives me time to think while drowning out the rest of the world with my ipod cranked to the highest it can get. i look at the river, the freeway, the people, the city and wonder if anyone else is doing the same as i am? i don't know if this is a good thing, but it's a good time for me to sit and ponder on the world. not the usual shit you would have conversations with people about, but what really matters to you the most in life and why it does.
i don't know what the ideal lifestyle for me is anymore. i always thought that getting married, having children and living in a huge old house was the best thing. but i don't know anymore? people can make choices in life, i know that. but what happens when those choices effect the people around you in a bad way? it's your life. live it. but without those people you cared about, what life do you have? i definitely would NOT want to be a loner hobo sitting on the side of the road waiting for someone to give me money just because of a decision i made for my own life.

so when do you really get to make your own decisions of where you're heading? or are you always constantly doing things for the people around you?

- r